It’s been a long time since I posted on this blog. There just didn’t seem to be much point since I lost Grimm, but things are looking up.
Bones has been insanely healthy since then. He’s now 2″ (5cm) long and still loves to eat like a pig. His favourite foods are dried shrimps, coleus leaves, grapes, carrots, bananas, mealworms, and blueberries. I’m trying to get him interested in dandelion greens, but he’s predisposed to hate the color green, apparently. He stands by the fact that being green does not make him Vulcan and that also means he ain’t no weed-eating vegetarian.
His words, not mine.
And speaking of weed-eating vegetarians, Bones has a new friend: Spock. Not that he would classify Spock as a friend, but that’s the way it is because I say so. Spock is bigger than Bones is. I would say he’s about 5″ (12.5cm) long, which means he doesn’t have to put up with any of Bones’ bitchin’. Nope, he goes and headbutts Bones anytime the turtle-doctor thinks he’s the boss of the tank. It’s a good relationship, I think. Bones has to get used to not being the only thing in the world that moves and swims.
He wasn’t too happy with my decision, though, and he protested heartily by eating one of the two inch-long feeder fish I put in there. Both my dad and I thought, “Hey, there’s no way he can catch one of those things, never mind eat them! They’re half his size!” and then two days later, one was missing and I later found its skeleton. I suspect Bones may have overheard us.
Anyway, here is Spock:
Spock the pleco and The Green Mile
You may have noticed that giant green thing following him around. That is his poop. There is so much of it, I can’t even describe it to you. I’d always expected that Vulcans would have very dry, very conservative poops because of their ability to live in the desert. Nope. Vulcans apparently have mile-long poops that multitask. When one poop is almost done, another one is formed and they chain together like disgusting algae sausage links.
On the plus side, there is almost no algae in the tank any more. On the downside, Spock is still pooping. Where does he get all this poop from? With the amount of food I give him, there is no conceivable way within the realm of physics that would allow him to create that much poop. He is a poop factory and he is not at all ashamed of it. He just swims around with his sausage links trailing behind him like the worst hot dog stand in existence.
Usually, he and Bones keep in their own respective areas of the tank. Bones rules the upper areas, hanging off the plants and relaxing in the heat lamp. Spock rules the depths, trolling the bottom of the tank for scraps of food and spirulina discs.
Occasionally, he decides to “help” Bones and clean his shell by sucking onto it while Bones freaks out and flails everywhere. This is what it looks like:
Artist’s Interpretation
Bones doesn’t even know what to do when this happens. It’s like that scene in the Mirror Mirror episode of Star Trek TOS when evil!Spock pins McCoy up against the wall and mind melds with him. Bones is just there, like “omg omg omg omg omg”.
And then eventually Spock realizes that not everything green is edible and lets him go, but only after inflicting untold childhood trauma.
This is going to be an interesting friendship.
In which Bones is a Turtle 